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Anyways they always say its bad to keep things inside u and try to make it fade away, and try to think everything is okay when its not. Its better to pour it out and cry your hearts out and things would seems slightly better. At this critical point in my life I think i wud defer what others has to say and decide to keep things inside me and try to make things fade away. There is no point to even voiceing out what you have to say becoz in the end of the day ppl just pity you and hope for the best for you. Its time for me to understand myself and love myself rather than torturing myself by crying and physically and mentally torturing myself. I have always love others 1st than loving myself and caring about myself. Guess im dead wrong in that....i need to love myself 1st only then to love others around me and ppl that are special and close to my heart.\ Everything I do seems wrong. Everything I say seems inccorrect. Everything seems to be unbalance and too much and overly done. I am trying to balance things, I am trying my upmost best to keep things not overly done but its like an imidiate U turn in me. I wake up everyday trying to mend my mistakes i made and every time i open my eyes and close my eyes it always ends up wif tears. Its not the same anymore waking up smilling, its not the same anymore going to sleep smilling & whisper to myself " i love you". Perhaps Silence is all I can do & it would be the better. I dont wanna argue I dont wanna cry. I just need time to understand and have guidance from you. |
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